Original post here.
Lately I’ve been learning how important it is to speak kindly to yourself.
I am in a new production this fall (A Christmas Carol! Come see it!) and we had a vocal rehearsal for the singers. Myself and two other girls make up The Jingle Belles: we sing Christmas songs and radio jingles throughout the show. We sing in three part harmony, and it’s been a loooooong time since I’ve had to flex my musician-brain-muscles. I’ve been working so hard on my part for the songs, but there is one line that doesn’t want to come out right. Before we could even dive into rehearsal, I uttered one of my favourite phrases:
“I just can’t do it!”
Alongside two excellent performers with my rusty musicianship, I felt like I would never get it right. Naturally, we improved during rehearsal, but I was feeling totally down and frustrated at my slow progress. Once we moved on to other parts of rehearsal, my friend and fellow Jingle Belle Erin gave me some wise advice:
“Don’t say you can’t. You psyched yourself out before you could even start!”
The girl has a point.
When I say I can’t- even if I’m joking or exaggerating- I’m putting the thought in my Type A brain that maybe I can’t do it.
Since that night, I’ve been making a conscious effort to erase “I can’t” from my vocabulary. It’s all about how you frame it; for example, I’ll say “I’m working on it” instead. Positivity is a powerful thing, and it’s amazing how a simple change of mindset can help you achieve your goals…or at least make you feel like you can.
(Please note that I’m still not sold on that vocal part, but I’m having lots of fun figuring it out!)